Three Jokes For You

Three Jokes For You

1.What's 18 inches long and hangs in front of an asshole?

Donald Trump's tie.

2.A linguistics professor is lecturing his class

A linguistics professor was lecturing his class the other day. "In English," he said, "a double negative forms a positive. However, in some languages, such as Russian, a double negative remains a negative. But there isn't a single language, not one, in which a double positive can express a negative."

A voice from the back of the room retorted, "Yeah, right."

3.This was Actually Said..

This was actually said in court and taken from a transcript:

Lawyer: "Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?"

Witness: "No."

Lawyer: "Did you check for blood pressure?"

Witness: "No."

Lawyer: "Did you check for breathing?"

Witness: "No."

Lawyer: "So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?"

Witness: "No."

Lawyer: "How can you be so sure, Doctor?"

Witness: "Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar."

Lawyer: "But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?"

Witness: "Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere."

3
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angelique hammond
angelique hammond
May 19
my boyfriend d**k beat that b***h he long dong Wong
Dave AA
Dave AA
May 19
yes so you had to cut off an inch to get in the W**g dong ding dong Club
DeWitt Astler
DeWitt Astler
May 19
The a*****e is the one who wrote the joke